AULD LANG SYNE

We get a baker’s dozen words from The Sunday Whirl, http://sundaywhirl.wordpress.com/, Wordle # 26. The words are: forgive, shoulder, topples, shallows, bolt, broken, gathered, dancing, drop, burst, causes, feet and hoops. Yeah, tough ones—I know; it really took some work to come up with a theme for that mess.

AULD LANG SYNE
by Mike Patrick

Flickr image by Dead Air

He parked for the sixth year in a row
beneath the basketball hoop.
There were more convenient places,
but here, they’d shared their first kiss.
She leaned across and kissed him again;
nothing like that first time,
this time was warm . . . intimate.

An odd couple? Perhaps.
He from poverty and a broken home,
she from a privileged dynasty.
In their barren four-year marriage,
there had been problems.
The marriage had come close to toppling.
More than once he considered bolting,
but there was no cause except stubbornness.
He finally forgave her for being rich—
and she forgave him for being him.

He opened the car door for her.
Hand in hand,
they walked through the shallow snow
to the country club
where all her family and friends were gathered.

Together, they danced cheek to cheek
through the evening,
his hand, warm on her bare shoulder.
The clock slowly closed on midnight.
As the band switched to Auld Lang Syne,
balloons began to drop
and burst beneath their feet.

She chose the middle of the floor
to stop, tiptoe to his lips,
and whisper, “I am pregnant.”

Advertisements
This entry was posted in A Wording Whirl of Sundays, Children, Family, Free Verse, Love, Music, Narrative Poem, Poetry, Un-rhyming and tagged , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

27 Responses to AULD LANG SYNE

  1. Oh… trouble is afoot!
    What a lovely whirl of words Mike. Gentle, image filled. Lovely!

  2. vivinfrance says:

    You old romantic you. I would have taken money on you coming up with a good ‘un, and I’d have won! “She chose the middle of THE floor”

  3. b_y says:

    If you thought they were tough words, you certainly don’t show it in the write. I like the story.

  4. brenda w says:

    This is great, Mike. It took me forever to get pregnant, and you’ve placed the moment when it is said aloud in a gorgeous celebratory setting. Excellent story…I really like this one, Mike. It has heart and understanding.

  5. Anonymous says:

    Love the humor. Marvelous to read the story Mike.

  6. Nanka says:

    The story poem went through all highs and lows, up’s and down’s and finally landed. Hope all’s well that ends well!! 🙂
    In reply to your question Mike I wrote first and knew it wouldn’t be tough to find those pictures!! It was as easy as finding a Christmas tree on the net at Christmas time!! 🙂

  7. islandcat2u says:

    Very nice, Mike. Love the set up. I can’t believe you’ve put the whirl words to such good use so quickly!

  8. Mike,
    A superb step-through to the very last moment and with a message greater than that of Auld Lang Syne!!!!
    Excellent…..

    Eileen

  9. Janet says:

    I love this, but you already know that;)

  10. earlybird says:

    You are such a softie!

    It’s weird. You’ve seen/done things I can’t even imagine but I’m a hardened cynic compared to your unflailing romanticism!

  11. geri=Mom says:

    Beautiful poem, Mike. It’s so visual and tender…I read your list of words and always wonder how you mange to come up with such beautiful poems..

  12. Mary says:

    I loved this poem, with its ups and downs, Mike. The ending took me for surprise. I don’t know what I was expecting, but it wasn’t that. It was a perfect ending to a well-crafted wordle!

  13. Mike, this is lovely. I love the surprise ending, and you are so right, there is too much ugly in the world. Thanks for this delightful tale.

    Pamela

  14. Oh Mike this was just lovely… I must say … well perhaps I mustn’t but I want to share that I am actually typing after reading with eyes blurred with tears and a pleasant catch in my throat. Just a wonderful memorable poem. I’ve been treating the “Wordles” as quick word puzzles…read the words get an image write as fast as I can… I may need to rethink in the presence of such sheer unadulterated joyful romantic beauty!!! Thank you for the pleasure 🙂

    • Mike Patrick says:

      Thank you, Doctor. It has only been recently I’ve begun spending more time one the wordle. Well, I spend more time one every poem lstely, but the wordle is my favorite prompt.

  15. Mrsupole says:

    Hi Mike,

    Only a true romantic would write something such as this. Really nice.

    I also wanted to let you know that the theme for each weeks Theme Thursday is now being posted on Sunday and then everyone can post it on Thursday. Please stop by to see what it is this week.

    God bless.

  16. Mr. Walker says:

    Mike, I love how it opens – and how it ends. There’s some tenderness in him, in parking where he does. I think it’s a “guy” thing; it rings true for me. I imagine him delighted with what she tells him – or maybe that’s just me. A delightful read.

    Richard

  17. Tilly Bud says:

    I love a happy ending, but I like that it comes after real problems. Nicely done, Mike 🙂

  18. I’m so glad you did this, Mike. You contrast the magic of uncommited love with the reality of working through the stuff that life brings it. Great finale.

    • Mike Patrick says:

      I have been thinking of changing the quote in the last line to, “I’m with child.” It sounds more rhythmic, but I don’t know if it’s a phrase anyone uses anymore.

  19. Renee Espriu says:

    I don’t think I could have done as well to include so many words and come out on top. I like the story line all the way ’round.

  20. Traci B says:

    Beautiful, Mike. I’m glad you persevered and made something glorious out of what you first saw as a mess of words. 🙂

  21. Susannah says:

    A lovely story and nice use of the wordle words.
    I loved….
    “He finally forgave her for being rich—
    and she forgave him for being him.”
    🙂

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s