WHEN JOY EXPIRED

In X Marks the Spot, in Imaginary Garden with Real Toads, http://withrealtoads.blogspot.com/2011/09/x-marks-spot.html, Grace O’Malley (don’t you love that name) asked us to write a rondeau. A rondeau is a French poetry form with a refrain (taken from the first part of the first line) repeated as the last line of the second and third stanzas. For the rhyming scheme, please check the posting at the above link. You can rest assured that my roudeau is in perfect form . . . kind of, mostly, sort of a little.

WHEN JOY EXPIRED
by Mike Patrick

Flickr image by emeryc

When joy expired, we searched for new
things to inspire our love. In lieu
of drifting days apart, we found
a spark of love still glowed profound
within the house we left askew.

Although we knew not what to do,
we loved the work which did ensue.
Our house became our hallowed ground
when joy expired.

Side by side we tore into
the rundown place because we knew
if we could once again surround
ourselves in love, it could rebound,
and we’d survive our first miscue,
when joy expired.

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This entry was posted in Iambic, Love, Poetry, Real Toads, Rhyming, Roudeau, Tetrameter and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

24 Responses to WHEN JOY EXPIRED

  1. A: Flattery will get you everywhere.
    B: I’m totally intimidated by your rondeau and now I have to go write one to match it.

    Excellent job! I love these challenge posts!!

  2. Kay Davies says:

    This is super. I’ve been trying to come up with one, but it seems I can’t take myself very seriously today and keep coming up with poems to my dog.
    I love the idea of renovating a house in order to find the joy that expired.
    — K

    Kay, Alberta, Canada
    An Unfittie’s Guide to Adventurous Travel

  3. Laurie Kolp says:

    I like the depth in this, Mike… what you focus on grows.

  4. Robert lloyd says:

    Wow Mike. This was an amazing rondeau. After reading this I would be slightly embarrassed to offer anything of my own. It was a nice smooth flowing piece that did not seemed contrived. The troubles of moving and restarting a home are easily seen in this. At least for me. Great job on this challenge and thank you for sharing.

    • Mike Patrick says:

      Thanks, Robert. I make it a point to never read a prompt or challenge poem before writing my own and posting it. That way I don’t get discouraged. Now that I’ve posted, and have time to read all the others, I feel the same. Every one I’ve read has been great. Ya gotta give it a try though.

  5. viv blake says:

    Do you believe in the inevitable expiry of joy? I don’t think it expires so much as evolves into contentment. A perfect rondeau.

    • Mike Patrick says:

      Gosh, there is a question I’ve never been asked before. Probably meant to be rhetorical, but it is a great question. I believe joy is renewed before it has time to expire. I’ll accept that old joy evolves into contentment, but new joys add life.

  6. Mr. Walker says:

    Mike, this is why I don’t write rhyming/metered poems: because yours is so good and mine seems so tacky in comparison. That phrase and title, “when joy expires” – that’s what makes it, and your talented use of rhyme, and the flow of your thoughts. I bow to your poetic prowess.

    Richard

  7. Awesome rondeau Mike. You inspire me 🙂

  8. jinksy says:

    Joy is everywhere! LOL Even in a somewhat ‘joy less’ rondeau which searches for it?! Thanks for a contented smile at this one…

  9. I read this earlier in the day and just loved it – the juxtaposition between home-making and relationship breakdown said much.

  10. Mike, once again you showed us how to do it. Bravo! I went a bit further and did a rondeau redoublé…. I have a lot of thoghts about the subject. Have a great day.

  11. Old Raven says:

    This is a wonderful poem … wonderful thoughts and challenging emotional charge. I really like it.

  12. Gaurang Rao says:

    Wow! Very Nice words here…I love the way you rhyme

  13. A spark is all love needs…

  14. Pete says:

    For me, it’s pretty perfect. The content is expressed logically and the rhymes are effortless. I doff my cap.

  15. I love this – the metre an repetition are absolutely perfect for the topic. Such a great poem to read!

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