For Margo Roby’s Tuesday Tryouts http://margoroby.wordpress.com/2011/08/30/tuesday-tryouts-poetic-form-the-lanturne/, this week, there is a new form: the lanturne—another short, syllable-count Japanese form. It has five lines with syllable-counts of one, two, three, four and one. It is written with center justification, and ideally will have the shape of a Japanese lantern when complete.
In typical Poet’s Quill fashion, I jotted down a quick attempt.
can provide the
I didn’t like it. The shape didn’t work, and although I liked what it said, it didn’t have the feel of Japanese poetry—duh. The next step was to Google “lanturne” to see if I was missing a step or two. Google did not turn up the usual explosion of authorities normally found. Most entries were written by poets (like me) trying out the form for the first time. I had to search through several pages before turning up two reasonably authoritative sources, http://www.ehow.com/how_4928414_write-lantern-poem.html, and, http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20090405124918AAXYhOV. They both say the first line is supposed to be a noun, the next three lines are descriptions of the first line, and the last is a synonym for the first.
With the absolute power of questionable knowledge behind me, I tried again. I will admit, these seem to fit closer to the Eastern philosophy, but they still lack a definitive lantern shape.
Towers of strength
Off to swim
Without a care