A Wording Whirl of Sundays http://sundaywhirl.blogspot.com/ wordle prompt this week contained, “burrows, murmurs, common, unafraid, inky, glow, undulate, purple, gaudy, heart, spin, abyss.” I’d be lying if I said this one did not give me problems. Reading through the wordle, I knew what I wanted to say, but it wanted to write itself in iambic hexameter, something I simply could not make work. It finally boiled down to iambic tetrameter, but the change makes it feel a bit forced.

by Mike Patrick

Flickr image by mattwester

From burrows where the poor repose
the murmurs of unrest arose.
The common man, whom none did fear,
at last had pricked oppression’s ear.

From humble home, one man set out,
the goal of freedom would he tout.
While striding proud and unafraid,
behind him formed a small parade.

From inky night to dawn’s first glow,
with every step the crowd did grow.
So quickly did it undulate
up to the city’s open gate.

Within the crowded city square,
the man stood on a broken chair
and held aloft his purple stain,
a finger, gaudy with disdain.

With freedom boiling in his heart,
he knew at last, he’d done his part.
He felt the spin of voter’s bliss;
he’d turned from tyranny’s abyss.

This entry was posted in A Wording Whirl of Sundays, Freedom, Iambic, Poetry, Rhyming, Tetrameter and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

15 Responses to TYRANNY’S DEMISE

  1. vivinfrance says:

    I like the rest of it, too!

  2. Marianne says:

    Bravo, Mike! This poem flows beautifully. Doesn’t seem forced at all … you do rhyming really well. I have never been able to make it work.

  3. You’ve done it again, Mike. Wonderful poem.


  4. Mary says:

    You created ‘art’ out of these words. Impressive work.

  5. Irene says:

    You paint a great picture of the overthrowing of a great tyranny. Nicely done, Mike.

  6. margo roby says:

    I know what you mean about these words and the brain. My brain wanted two other forms before it finally settled on the almost ghazal. I would not have known you had a hard time if you hadn’t said, so while it may sound forced to you, it reads well. The words are so natural I had to go back to look for most of them.

  7. pmwanken says:

    amazed, as always….
    it’s a good thing my life doesn’t depend on rhyming….

    thanks, as always, for your feedback and support…

  8. One of those times when a stain is a good thing. I’ve never been very good at meter, so I always admire those who can pull it off.

  9. Tilly Bud says:

    A particularly good poem of yours, Mike.

  10. Susannah says:

    Really nicely done. I enjoyed the tale and admired the rhyme.

  11. Mr. Walker says:

    Mike, another good one. I really liked “The common man, whom none did fear” – and how you took that idea and told an important story. While I liked the picture you posted as well, it was not necessary, because your poem invoked similar images so well. Thanks.


  12. Traci B says:

    Terrific poem, and not at all forced sounding. We all remember the rejoicing that accompanied those inky fingers, and your words recall those reports to mind. 🙂

  13. Renee Espriu says:

    This is so well written, Mike, and I look forward to whatever you write and have not been disappointed yet.

  14. brenda w says:

    Mike, Thank you for playing with the wordle words. A rhyming piece is a pleasant surprise. You work it well, the thymes flow easy, and I love seeing the words play there way through it. Well constructed!

  15. You fit the words in effortlessly, or so it reads. I’m sure u had to work at it. Excellent job.


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