I’m about out of prompts I can work with from this weeks Big Tent Poetry All that was left was write a poem with lungs in it, or one that starts with “The legend says ______,” or finally, one from the point of view of a fish. I had always hoped that those SCUBA lessons would pay off someday, but today wasn’t the day. I hate what came out today. This is the lamest, most contrived peace of  **** I’ve ever written, but I made up my mind at the beginning of the week to use the prompts. This one should come with a warning label: Burn before reading.

by Mike Patrick

Flickr image by Crystal Images

Ever diligent, that’s my motto.
Those big guys leave no room for error,
and most everybody’s bigger than I.
That’s the price I have to pay
to live in the most beautiful place ever.
Swimming among the stag horn, pillar, and brain coral
is like a trip through the Louvre . . .
except more beautiful, and with more color.
I’m really quick, and my coral friends shelter me.
All those little gaps and holes:
havens, safe harbors, security.
Feel free to come and visit,
but watch out for those big guys.

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  1. vivinfrance says:

    ` Burn before reading` not on your Nelly Duff. To me (who loves clown fish) this seems like a freewrite that is just beseeching you to work on it some more. There is a symbiosis between sea anemones, coral, clown fish and chromos that produces an explosion of breathtaking beauty.

  2. Mike Patrick says:

    I agree with the beauty, but I’ve actually only made three SCUBA dives on coral reefs, and they were over thirty years ago. I live a thousand miles away from the ocean. I don’t know enough about that symbiosis to write intelligently about it.

    The good thing about this poem is that it will look brilliant compared to tomorrow’s when the prompt is to write a poem with a lung.

  3. I think it’s darn clever. You’ll notice, I didn’t take the prompts on BTP this week…just couldn’t get into the mindset of a fish. Good luck with the lung. Yikes.

  4. honeyhaiku says:

    Nice, Clown fish are one of my favorites.

  5. pmwanken says:

    Mike, you crack me up! Especially your response to Viv…LOL @ comparing it to tomorrow’s prompt about a lung!

    I’ve been enjoying your writing…ALL of it! 😉

  6. Marianne says:

    Good lord, you are much too hard on yourself. This is a fun piece, with nice imagery and good lines.

  7. ladynimue says:

    You did loose the flow after line 5 .. but i enjoyed reading it .. Anything of sea fascinates me to no end !

  8. trisha says:

    it may not be serious like most of your poems but its beautiful in its way. 🙂

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