Triptych

Viv, at http://vivinfrance.wordpress.com/2011/02/08/triptych-for-we-write-poems-3-2-11/#comment-3288, in her demonic drive to mess with my mind, introduced me to a new concept in poetry construction: a Triptych. A triptych is simply a poem in three sections, but to mess with me more, she requires it be written using self-made prompts gestalted through a list created under the headings of Heaven, Earth, and Man.

Well, here is the list I came up with. Not very original I suppose, but its construction left my head swimming.

Heaven         Earth             Man
Peace              solid              frail
Clouds           rock                flesh
God                nature            work
Salvation    growing          love
Soul               sea                   wife
Universe    firmament     child

Using the list, I cobbled up what I had hoped would be a beautiful sonnet. Instead, this is what came out. I’m pretty sure it can’t be called a sonnet, and I can’t even think up a title for it.

The Earth is just a tiny part
Of God’s expanding plan.
Perhaps an afterthought
Caused the birth of man.

Why did he place us here
On this spinning ball of rock?
To bow before his mighty grace?
No . . . somehow, I think not.
There’s more to man than flesh and blood.
There’s love and wife and child,
Somewhere within a soul resides
And must be reconciled.

We must question not the wisdom, which is His.
It’s enough for man to know: He is.

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9 Responses to Triptych

  1. vivinfrance says:

    Sorry, Mike: not guilty. The task came from http://wewritepoems.wordpress.com/ and I had as much difficulty as you in doing it. I think the honours should go to yours, and I am applauding you.

    • Mike Patrick says:

      Going to the source, and reading some of the “Triptych” poems, illustrated how poorly I understood the concept. The more I learn, the less I know.

      Well, it was kind of fun, and I really don’t think you’re demonic. Think I’ll leave it posted for a while to see what kind of comments I get. This may be useful to generate ideas.

      I liked yours.

  2. Tilly Bud says:

    Mike, it doesn’t matter: the prompt sites are to get you writing so if you go off-prompt it’s okay; the muse takes us all in different ways. I haven’t been inspired by the prompt sites for weeks, yet sometimes I’m flinging poems out so fast I can’t keep up with myself. The important thing is to write.

    If you know that you don’t know much, then you know more than most people know. The single most important thing I got from doing my degree is how little I know.

    I really enjoyed your poem; I found it thoughtful and thought-provoking.

    • Mike Patrick says:

      Throughout the years, I’ve read a lot of “classical” poetry. I began writing poetry about twenty years ago, but it was on the level of a high school kid. I didn’t get serious about writing poetry until I retired with a shattered elbow about three years ago. Only since then have I been exposed to newer poetry forms. There is SO much to learn, but this is so much fun. Readers like you have been helpful and kind, when all the while I expected to be hammered for being so primitive. Thank you.

  3. Jingle says:

    beautiful….
    keep your creative juice running.
    Cheers.

  4. I enjoyed each piece for what it seems to me, beautiful, creative art 🙂 Thank you. It came across as if you enjoyed it, making it even more fun of a read!
    http://lynnaima.wordpress.com

    • Mike Patrick says:

      Thank you lynnaima. If I enjoyed it, it was because I love to write. The actual exercise was exhausting. I am glad you liked it, bucause I felt it was horrable and was thinking about deleting it. Again, thank you.

  5. pmwanken says:

    NO! Don’t delete it! 🙂

    Somewhere else in your blog you made the comment that you only post SOME of your poems here…..I think all poetry is worth posting…no words are ever wasted. You never know who might be touched by which words!

    Love the lines:
    Somewhere within a soul resides
    And must be reconciled.

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